I finally feel like I crossed over the working mom to work at home mom bridge. The holidays are over and school is back on. After a few days of actually catching up on behind the scenes stuff for this blog and having some writing work, I’ve determined that the only “staying” that this mom is doing involves staying in front of the computer “working” (while the kids are at school). School started back up on Wednesday.
You don’t actually have as much “free time” as you would think!
I spend a lot of time driving back and forth from home to my kids’ schools. I thought I would have about four hours kid free a day. It is actually more like 2.5 when you take drive time, walking to the classroom and back etc, into consideration.
(I haven’t braved the parent pick up line and prefer to walk from the parking lot to parent pick up gate to get my son. That line just does not look inviting.)
photo source
I’m a little busier than I imagined I would be but I am busier tending what I love–my children, my home, my education, and my blog. I haven’t gotten around to sitting down and planning a workable routine. I am taking three online courses, so that has thrown a little wrench into the fledgling daily schedule that emerged last week.
Something unexpected always happens.
Today’s schedule was a good mix of productivity and quality kid time so I hope to evolve my schedule to be close to how things went today. I had to run errands while Pea was at school, which is the time I had slated for studying. After I brought her back home, we had a leisurely lunch and I folded a load of laundry. Then it was time to get Pork Chop. We had to park pretty far and walk to get him today because the rain resulted in more parents showing up to pick up their children. I don’t blame them. I would hate to make my kids walk home in cold rain.
We had quality homework time. I wasn’t trying to fit in homework time while cooking dinner like I did while working outside the home. We used to get home home after 7:00 so evenings were always a mad rush to the bedtime fights. This afternoon, both kids had apples and pb/soy butter, while we looked over the directions to their homework and took the time to focus on just the work. I realize now that it used to be an annoyance for me to have to read my son the directions!
All this togetherness has resulted in sibling bickering
The Hubs suggested we cut down on TV time, which I agree with. I thought it would be a battle but I turn off the TV and the kids continue to play without noticing. At first they colored or played their pretend games amicably but the sibling bickering has slowly increasing. Part of me chalks it up to increased time together but considering the weather lately, I know that Pea’s JIA is bothering her. She started the afternoon of fighting by purposefully hiding Pork Chop’s lego pieces while he was trying to build something. Fun times!
I’ve made lots of new friends….but they are all online
The SAHM parent set at our elementary school (I’ve seen just as many Dads dropping and picking up the kids at school as Moms!) doesn’t seem particularly welcoming. Then again, the other parents haven’t been stand- offish or rude, either. They just all seem to know each other. Our elementary school has a mandatory 10 hours of volunteer per family rule. I am sure many of the SAHM know each other from hours of working together at the school. This is our first year there and I am little behind on my hours. (Okay–I haven’t started yet!) I am sure I will meet other parents when I buck up and do my duty.
On the other hand, there are many women a fingertip away that are willing to help me figure things out, decide what to make for dinner, share their kid crafts and tips, and offer encouragement and support. The blogging community is truly a welcoming one. I did read a post from a blogger that felt that there were many cliques in the blogging community that were hard to break into. Online relationships can be as intimidating as real world relationships. The only thing to do is smile or 🙂 introduce yourself and hope you click. If you don’t, then you don’t. There are other bloggers in the sea. Not every person you meet face to face becomes a friend. The same can be said of every avatar you meet.
NJ @ A Cookie Before Dinner says
I thought I’d have more time too. As it turns out, I got busier with life things that really matter to me.
I agree with you about the school schlep. It could be rough. We’re looking into sending Malone to Kinder in a different district and the schlep already has me crying, but I know that it will be worth it. It all hangs on if he gets in (it is a lottery).
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Herchel says
Gotta love the lottery. My son got into his school right before they started. At least my daughter now has priority.
Kimberly H Smith says
This is so true! So many new friends but online. And I’m busier now than when I was working outside the home. I laugh all the time at the unexpected things that happen that I am able to handle because I work from home now. Thanks for sharing.
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Life Breath Present says
So true, even though we haven’t gotten anywhere close to school aged, being a SAHM doesn’t afford me as much time as I’d somehow imagined, what with Baby Boy trying to “help” me work by grabbing the mouse or pushing random buttons on the keyboard, wanting to be held and fed or played with randomly. Plus the cleaning and the cooking, some days are rather harried 🙂
Stopping over from the Monday Hop, btw.
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Dawn says
Taking care of the kids is definitely a full-time job—that’s why when we can’t do it, we pay someone else to! Add anything else into the mix, like part-time work or blogging or, you know, life, and there just aren’t enough hours in the day. Come to think of it, there aren’t enough hours in the day on the days when those things don’t factor in either…. 😉
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Constance @ TheCraftyReporter says
So so so true! 🙂 There’s always something to do! Love how honest you are in this post!
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Bonnie a.k.a. LadyBlogger says
I can definitely identify with your revelations! Your last one about all of your friends being online made me smile…So true!
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Kerstin @ Auer Life says
If it’s not the kids, it’s the dog. You’re right – there is not a whole lot of time to go around even if the kids are technically in school for 6 hours…
It took me four months to find a routine that works for me and I’m still perfecting it 🙂
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Herchel says
My husband asked me at noon if I was going to shower!
AwesomelyOZ says
Blogger cliques can be very intimidating indeed – especially if you’re a newbie blogger with no foundation but things do get easier and slowly you develop relationships. At least you’re able to take online classes, that should be distracting some! 🙂 I have a hard time interacting with the parents at my son’s school because I’m one of the youngest haha.. it takes time hopefully, I’ll meet some over time. There’s never enough time in the world to do all we want to do and impose on ourselves. Have a great one Herchel! -Iva
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Dee Williamson says
Oh my, this is exactly how I feel. I am on the computer a whole lot more, now that I stay at home. Blogging really is a full-time job, between social media, writing my content, taking my pictures, editing… the list goes on. I don’t mind, because I am also with our three children who don’t attend school yet. But then I do mind, when I want to get away from the house. Haha!
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Amber says
Yes! I agree with this. Especially the time thing. I HATE when people go, “It must be nice to have all that free time.” It’s not all free!
Karen @TheMissingNiche says
Ha ha! I have no free time. I should be doing something while I’m doing nothing but I’m not! Both my kids are in school and I still get nothing done!
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Herchel says
You were writing. That’s something lol. Loved the new post.
Jennifer DeMoss says
A great way to meet moms is by going to a local park to walk or taking a trip to the library. It’s interesting that you guys have mandatory volunteer time! Wonder how that works for parents that literally don’t have the time to do that? Stopped by from SITs today! Have a blessed day!
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Herchel says
They are ruthless about it! If you don’t complete the hours your child cannot return the following year. The school is a magnet school. :/
Kim says
Truthfully, I thought working was easier 🙂 Even though my kids are older, you still have less time than you think you would, lots of it because people put so much extra on you because you are a SAHM and have all this “extra” time. When I was working, I had good blocks of time, that I could be productive with, but as a SAHM, it seems as though all that “free time” is divided into small blocks that are hard to be productive with- you know, the 15 minutes here, 20 minutes there, just enough to start, but not finish something- and YES so much time is sucked away in car line. ARRGH.
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Herchel says
At least by parking down the street and walking to get him, I fit in a few minutes of exercise. Pe would hate sitting in the car in that line!
Michelle says
I thought I would have more time being at home too…not the case! I run kids all over the place and when you throw errands in, my day gets broken into little blocks where I can work. I can never just sit and work a full eight hour day. So I end up working late at night, during practices, etc, etc. Sometimes it’s frustrating, but I do appreciate the flexibility.
You will meet people. I made my closest in real life parent friends when my kids started doing sports. And even though the kids are no longer on the same teams or even playing the same sports, I’m still close to a lot of those parents.
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Herchel says
That’s true, Michelle. I have met other moms through soccer. I bet the real issue is that the other Sahm are just as busy as I am!